The Right Wish Page 6

My ears rang with the sound of other voices. On one level, I knew who held me, but I recalled other ones with punishing grips who had ignored my pleas. Frantic, I brandished the knife.

  “Whoa.” Ben’s gaze dipped to the knife, then rose. He threw one hand in the air, palm up, and leaned back. “Not interested in that kind of playing.”

  “Neither am I.” Breaking free of the past, I lowered the blade and sucked a gulp of air into my lungs.

  “I heard shouting.” Her eyes wide, Jewel hurried into the kitchen from the dining room, with Rush and Jack alongside her.

  To my chagrin, Bradley stepped into the kitchen from the other entrance. “What the hell is going on?” he demanded, his voice booming.

  “Nothing. Nothing’s going on.”

  My spine snapped straight as Bradley barreled toward me. He must have entered the condo while Ben was distracting me. Ben stood in Bradley’s way, blocking his view of the knife, but I was pretty sure everyone else saw me slide it onto the counter behind me.

  “Doesn’t look like nothing.” Bradley stopped in front of me, frowning down at the hand Ben still had on the belt loop at my waist.

  “Just a little misunderstanding,” Ben said as he released me.

  “Not little. Not when there’s shouting.” Bradley shook his head at the vague explanation. He wasn’t buying it, and he wouldn’t let it rest. He never seemed to let anything rest that involved a potential opportunity to lecture me.

  “It was a misunderstanding between Ben and me.” I lifted my chin when Bradley shifted his full intensity my way. “It doesn’t concern you.”

  “I’m the manager of this band. What happens with any of its members concerns me.” His sharp gaze sliced through me. “My question and the request for clarification were directed at Ben, not you.”

  “Ah, I got it.” And it hurt like all the other blunt truths he’d delivered. “Well, since I don’t belong here and what I have to say isn’t relevant, I’ll just leave. Excuse me.” I turned toward the dining room, my eyes burning with angry tears.

  “Wait a minute.” Jewel stepped in front of me, blocking my escape.

  “It’s okay. I’m okay.” It was a lie, but I refused to let Bradley know he’d gotten to me. “I’m just going for a walk.”

  “Another walk?” She shook her head. “But what about dinner?”

  “I’m not hungry anymore. You guys can go ahead and eat without me.”

  “But you made everything.”

  “I can’t stay. It’s not an inclusive club.” I tossed out the sarcasm without making eye contact with Bradley, but I could feel the weight of his disapproval.

  “You are welcome wherever I am,” Jewel said firmly. “Brad just says pissy things when anyone messes with his perfect vision for the band.”

  I’d noticed, and I certainly remembered her confiding in me how Bradley had given her a hard time at the beginning of her relationship with Rush.

  Jewel stepped closer and said softly, “I think the real reason you want to leave is because Ben scared you.”

  I nodded once.

  “Everyone out,” Jewel announced abruptly. “I need to speak alone with my best friend.” She threw her arm around me while squinting disapprovingly at Bradley.

  “Right. You heard her.” Rush circled his finger high in the air. His silver Gothic cross ring glinted in the light. “Let’s sit down and get some tour business out of the way while the girls talk privately.”

  “Wait a minute,” Bradley said, his brows drawing together. “I think there’s more to discuss with Ben.”

  “Give it a rest, Bradley.” Ice frosted Rush’s gray eyes. “The matter’s closed.”

  “I hear you.” Bradley turned and walked away, the soles of his Ferragamos slapping his displeasure into the hardwoods I’d mopped earlier.

  My nails dug crescents into my palms as I watched him leave the kitchen, passing through the living area on the other side to get to the dining room rather than slip by me.

  “Cam,” Jewel said.

  I dragged my gaze from Bradley shrugging out of his Armani jacket back to her. She gave me a considering look, making me worry that she might wonder if the fire inside me toward Rush’s business manager wasn’t all anger.

  “I’m sorry. I overreacted. I just . . .” I shrugged and took ownership. “I just don’t feel like myself sometimes.”

  “Since the men attacked you. I know.” Her eyes filled, and so did mine. “I know how you feel.”

  “Almost isn’t the same.” I appreciated her empathy, but what happened to her wasn’t even close to what had happened to me.

  “You’re right, but the way I felt—and still feel sometimes in certain situations—is a lot like I think you do.”

  “Maybe.” I allowed for that. She’d been cornered at the shelter and threatened physically before I’d intervened.

  “We need to talk about this. About what happened to you.”

  “No, we don’t.” I shook my head.

  “You’re skittish around the guys, even Rush sometimes. You’re not sleeping or eating well. You disappear for long stretches of time whenever I press you. And after this, with the knife and Ben . . .” She sighed, searching my gaze. “I don’t feel comfortable going on tour and leaving you here alone. I think I should stay.”

  “I’ll be fine. No need to worry.” The words echoed falsely.

  “I can’t not worry. I love you, Cam. You’re hurting, and if you can’t talk to me, you need to talk to someone.”

  “Maybe.”

  “No maybe. It’s brave to ask for help when you’re frightened.”

  “I’ll think about it,” I said, but I wouldn’t. A shrink would dig and discover things, things I didn’t want to get into. Things that couldn’t be arranged into a happy ending. I held her gaze. “Am I free to go now?”

  “You don’t need to ask my permission to leave. This is your home too, no matter what Bradley says. He’s rude when he’s in protective mode. You shouldn’t let him get to you. Before the assault, I don’t think you would have.”

  “Everything’s different now.”

  “I know. I wish I could make all the bad go away.” Her golden eyes shimmered.

  “I wish I could too.” For her and for me.

  “We’ll make it through. I’ll be here for you, like you were for me when things were hard. We have each other.”

  “We do.” For now, but she was going away. I would insist on it.

  “But you won’t stay for dinner?”

  “No. I need some time by myself. I’ll be back later.”

  “Do what you need to do, Cam.” She shook her head. “But don’t stay out in the dark on your own too long. I need you.”

  “Okay, Jewel.”

  I knew the darkness she referred to was my emotional withdrawal from her, concerned that isolation was a step into depression. Jewel was worried about me, and I was worried about me too. More often than not, I preferred the escape of my stories over reality . . .

  Even a reality that included her.

  Chapter 7

  * * *

  Bradley

  “What the hell is up with you tonight?” Rush sat up on his lounger to grab his beer from the side table, and tipped it back while watching me closely.

  “What makes you think something’s up?” I played it casual, crossing my legs at the ankles and moving my gaze to the dark expanse of the ocean.

  “Quit the bullshit, Brad.” Rush’s bottle clattered on the glass, his response telling me what I already knew. My acting skills sucked. “We’ve been friends since grade school. Practically spent every spare moment together since. You’re a good guy, but you’ve been acting more uptight than usual lately, especially around Camaro. You practically bit her head off tonight, and when you were through making her feel bad, you ran off Ben too.”

  “He left to get laid,” I grumbled, but I knew it was more.

  “Ben was sick of you laying into him about the cost overruns on the last tour.”


  “Timmons said—”

  “Timmons is the boss, yeah. I get it. We all do. But she’s not part of this family. You and I are. Jewel, Jack, Ben, and despite what you said, Camaro too.”

  “Interesting the order.”

  Rush let out a breath and sat up in his chair. The hinges squeaked beneath him. “We’re first, you and me, because this dream with music started with us.”

  When he went silent, I turned away from the view to look at him. It was getting dark, anyway, and no one was out on the beach to provide the distraction I needed, mostly from myself.

  “Is something wrong between you and Bree?”

  I nodded. That was the underlying problem, but even that took second place after I walked in on Ben with Camaro, his hands on her hips like she was his.

  “Wondered why she wasn’t here tonight.”

  “She’s been fooling around on me.”

  His eyes widened. “I find that difficult to believe.”

  So had I. Or maybe I just didn’t want to believe it. “I hired the same guy to investigate her that I called when Jewel went missing.”

  “I’m sorry. I know how badly a betrayal like that cuts.”

  “You don’t.”

  “My brother and Brenda.”

  “Yeah, but they got together after you split up.” I shook my head. “Bree and I never took a break that I was aware of. I thought we were a couple.”

  But we hadn’t been, not even in the beginning. The investigator’s report that was emailed to me today was thorough.

  “I keep running it all through my head, and I just can’t find the place where it all went wrong.”

  “You breaking it off with her?” he asked.

  I nodded. “Tonight.”

  “Good. You deserve better, man.”

  I didn’t know about that. Unsettled, I was questioning everything, even the things I knew deep down that I’d gotten right.

  “I’m not in a good place.” I raked a hand through my hair. “I shouldn’t have come over feeling like this.”

  “You’re in the exact right place. I didn’t invite you over expecting you to be the life of the party. Which, incidentally, you hardly ever are anymore.” He shook his head and chuckled softly.

  I didn’t take offense. He was right. My carefully arranged life was boring.

  “Hey.” Jewel stepped out onto the patio, drying her hands on a striped towel. “Kitchen’s clean, and Jack just left.”

  “Everyone seems to be turning in early.” Rush curled his fingers, beckoning her to join him.

  “Jack said he’ll see you in the morning.”

  “Sit and rest.” Rush scooted backward and patted the cushion at the end of his lounger. Jewel moved closer to him, but remained standing.

  “I was harsh with Camaro.” I put that straight out there. Rush was right, and I needed to clean up my mess. “It was kind of her to cook for us, and I made her and everyone else miserable because of stuff going on in my personal life. I’m sorry. I should apologize to her for the way I acted.” I hooked a thumb toward the interior of the condo. “Is she inside?”

  “No.” Jewel shook her head. “She hasn’t returned since she took off earlier.”

  That was hours ago. I’d been so wrapped up in my own head, I hadn’t noticed her like I usually did.

  I went instantly alert. “But surely she called you since then.”

  “No, she hasn’t.” Jewel’s brow creased.

  “Did you try to call her?”

  “Yes, and I texted her. I called again, but she’s not picking up. She knows to respond. We have a system. It’s how we look out for each other.” Jewel worried her bottom lip with her teeth. “And she doesn’t usually stay out this late. Not since . . .”

  “Since the sexual assault,” I said, filling in what she didn’t say. I’d noticed that she and Camaro shied away from direct references to it.

  She bobbed her head. “I’m going to look for her.” Discarding the towel, Jewel took a determined step forward.

  “You’re not going anywhere.” Standing, Rush caught her and turned her toward him. “She’s probably fine, but if she’s in any trouble, you blazing into it and getting hurt too isn’t going to help her.”

  “Let go of me, Rush.” Stubborn like Camaro, Jewel lifted her chin.

  “You’re not going out in the dark. You could trip and fall. Hurt the baby.”

  “What baby?” I froze as I studied their faces, noting the radiant glow in Jewel’s complexion and the pride in her expression. “You’re pregnant?”

  She nodded. “It’s early. It’s not smart to tell anyone until after the twenty-week mark, but yes, I am.”

  “Congratulations.” I glanced at Rush. “To both of you.”

  “Thanks, man.” Rush beamed.

  “You two stay here,” I said firmly. “I’ll go find Camaro.”

  Jewel shook her head. “She’s my best friend. I should go with you.”

  “I’d like a chance to apologize. It’ll be less embarrassing for me without an audience.”

  “I don’t know.”

  “I’m not her favorite person,” I said with a sigh. “I get that. I’m protective of Rush, and she and I, well, we didn’t exactly start out on the right foot.”

  “She never said anything to me.” Suspicion narrowed Jewel’s gaze. “Got off on the wrong foot, how?”

  I shook my head. “If she didn’t tell you, it’s not my place to share.” I’d been harsher with Camaro when we met, more than I needed to be at the time, but only because she got to me. More than I wanted to admit. “Do you have any idea where she went?”

  The crease between Jewel’s auburn brows deepened. “Venice Beach, I’m pretty sure.”

  “Why would she go all the way over there?” It was a couple of miles away, and she left on foot.

  “She likes it. I think because it’s more like our old neighborhood.”

  “Your old neighborhood was dangerous.” My delivery man had been shot at there, and Camaro had been raped.

  “She’s friends with two kids who live over there. A brother and a sister. Economically disadvantaged. She thinks they’re neglected and there might be physical abuse, and so she buys them food. They like her stories.”

  Rush frowned at Jewel. “You didn’t say anything to me about all of this.”

  “It’s Camaro. Someone’s hurting, she gets involved.”

  Not entirely surprised by the revelation, I asked Jewel, “Do you have an address for the kids?”

  “No, but they live with their father above his business. Pete’s Tattoos. It’s on the boardwalk.”

  “Did you call there?”

  “Yeah, but no one answered.”

  “I’ll try the tattoo place first,” I said as I hustled to the stairs.

  “Brad,” Jewel called. “Be careful.”

  “Always am,” I said. But as I lifted my hand above my shoulder and waved to acknowledge her comment, I wondered if being careful was best anymore.

  I hit the sidewalk at a fast clip, covering a lot of ground quickly. My feet almost immediately started hurting. Ferragamos were comfortable for closing business deals, but they weren’t practical for a two-mile sprint across concrete.

  No one looked twice at me as I speed-walked along the beach path in my business attire in Santa Monica. But that changed when I reached Venice.

  It was predictably crowded, and nearly everyone there was in beach wear. Heads turned—multihued, tatted, and pierced ones. The people strolling and rollerblading on the boardwalk were as colorful and varied as the businesses, including Pete’s Tattoos, which was clearly marked.

  I jogged up the front walkway of the dilapidated bungalow but didn’t see any sign of Camaro. The worn boards on the porch creaked in protest when I stepped onto them. I knocked on the door, and when no one answered, I peeked inside one of the windows. Through a break in the blinds, I could see that the lights were off inside.

  Backing off the porch, I glanced up, bu
t the second-story windows were dark too. It seemed no one was home.

  Retracing my steps down the walkway, I rolled up my sleeves and rejoined the stream of people on the boardwalk. My cell rang just as I jumped aside, barely avoiding being barreled into by a speeding skateboarder.

  “Bradley Marshall,” I said automatically into the receiver.

  “Did you find her?” Jewel sounded panicked.

  “No. Not yet. No sign of her at Pete’s. Where else does she go over here?”

  “Boardwalk Market for groceries.”

  “She goes two miles to shop for food, and then carries it back home?”

  “She says it saves Rush a ton of money.”

  “He’s a big rock star. He doesn’t need to save money,” I muttered, but I actually admired her thriftiness. Something else interesting about Camaro that I hadn’t known previously.

  “She worries she’s taking advantage by staying with us and wants to feel like she’s being useful. It’s her way to contribute, so I don’t say anything about the distance.”

  And I made her feel like an outsider. Fuck me.

  My grip on my cell tightened. I exhaled, feeling like an even bigger asshole than before.

  “Anyplace else I should check?” I asked, my tone gruff with irritation. Mostly at myself.

  “The public basketball courts.”

  “She plays basketball?” Incredulousness rang in my tone. Camaro had a smoking-hot tight body. My favorite fantasy was her in the lingerie and stilettos she’d worn the first time we met, but I couldn’t imagine her playing basketball.

  “Vendors set up tables around the courts. It’s where she goes to tell her stories.”

  “What?” I shook my head to clear it of the image of Camaro running up and down the court in lingerie and stilettos, and then my brain finally engaged. “Ah. You mentioned the story stuff earlier.”

  “Find her, Brad. Please. Call me back as soon as you do. I’m worried.”

  Shit. My insensitivity had sent Camaro out into the night. This was all my fault.

  Guilt churned in my gut as I turned off the boardwalk. Striding down a dimly lit alley beside the ball courts, I heard voices almost immediately. Young ones.

  Then I saw them. No vendors. Just Camaro and two kids, a platinum-haired young boy and a little girl with pigtails the same color, facing off against a big guy.